Welcome to the Stop Sabotaging Your Success Podcast, episode seventy-one. I’m your host, Cindy Esliger. This is the podcast focusing on what we can do today to take control of our careers and overcome the inevitable barriers to success that we encounter along the way. 

Worrying is a common issue that affects many people, where we tend to dwell on negative thoughts about what could happen in the future. Many of us think worrying will help motivate us to take action, but excessive worrying can have negative effects on our mental health, physical health, and overall well-being. 

In this episode, we’ll examine the negative effects of worrying and how it relates to anxiety, as well as strategies for managing your worries so you can stop sabotaging your efforts to build the career you’ve always wanted. 

Worrying and anxiety are closely related and worrying is often a symptom or a precursor to anxiety. Worrying is the cognitive aspect of anxiety, which involves thinking about potential negative outcomes or future events that might be unpleasant or harmful. Anxiety, on the other hand, is the emotional or physiological response to the cognitive aspect of worrying. In other words, anxiety is the body’s natural response to the perceived threat or danger associated with the worry. 

Anxiety is that feeling of unease or fear and prolonged anxiety can lead to other mental health issues such as depression, insomnia, and even panic attacks. Worrying can lead to anxiety because it involves repetitive and negative thinking about a particular situation or event. As we ruminate on these negative thoughts, our bodies respond by releasing stress hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline. These hormones prepare our bodies for fight-or-flight response, which can cause physical symptoms such as increased heart rate, sweating, and muscle tension. 

Over time, chronic worrying can lead to an ongoing state of anxiety, where the body is in a constant state of heightened arousal, even in the absence of an actual threat or danger. This can cause further physical symptoms such as difficulty sleeping and digestive issues. 

Worrying can lead to anxiety, and anxiety can then reinforce worrying, so it becomes a vicious cycle. To break this cycle, it’s essential to manage your worry by challenging your negative thoughts, practicing relaxation techniques, seeking support, and focusing on the present moment. By managing your worry effectively, you may prevent or reduce anxiety and improve your overall well-being. 

It’s common to be concerned about actual or potential problems or events that may or may not happen in the future. Our natural response to uncertainty or perceived threats can sometimes be helpful in motivating us to take action to prevent negative outcomes. While some worrying is normal and can be helpful, excessive or chronic worrying can have negative effects on both the mind and body. It’s important to seek professional help if worrying begins to interfere with your daily life or causes you significant distress. 

Excessive worrying can lead to feelings of overwhelm, which can interfere with daily activities and negatively impact relationships and work performance. It can also lead to rumination, a pattern of repetitive and negative thinking that can worsen anxiety and depression. 

Worrying can be both productive and unproductive, depending on how it affects our thoughts and actions. Productive worrying can be helpful in motivating us to take action and prepare for potential problems or challenges. For example, if you’re worried about an upcoming exam, productive worrying might prompt you to study more, seek help from a tutor, or make a plan to manage your time effectively. Productive worrying can help us anticipate and prepare for challenges, and it can also help us problem solve and find solutions to issues that may arise. 

On the other hand, unproductive worrying is excessive and chronic and it can interfere with daily life and well-being. Unproductive worrying often involves repetitive and negative thoughts that focus on hypothetical scenarios or worst-case outcomes. For example, if you’re worried about a job interview, unproductive worrying might involve imagining all the ways that you could fail, obsessing over small details, and feeling paralyzed. Unproductive worrying can cause stress, anxiety, and depression, and it can also lead to avoidance and procrastination. 

The key difference between productive and unproductive worrying is how it affects our behavior and, therefore, our results. Productive worrying motivates us to take action and find solutions, while unproductive worrying can cause paralysis and avoidance. To make worrying more productive, it’s important to focus on actionable steps and solutions rather than dwelling on worst-case scenarios and hypothetical outcomes. If you find yourself stuck in unproductive worrying, it may be helpful to seek support from a mental health professional who can help you develop strategies to manage your anxiety and improve your well-being. 

Here are four ways that worrying about what people think of us and our abilities can sabotage our efforts to succeed:

1. Fear of failure
2. Lack of confidence
3. Overthinking
4. Seeking approval

When we worry about what others think of us, we may become overly focused on avoiding failure. This fear can prevent us from taking risks and trying new things, which can limit our growth and development in our careers. Worrying about how others perceive us can also undermine our confidence in our own abilities. This lack of confidence can affect our performance and our willingness to take on new challenges and responsibilities. We may become overly self-conscious and second-guess our decisions. 

I’m sure I’m not the only one who gets mired in overthinking, which can be counterproductive and cause us to miss opportunities or delay important tasks. Sometimes our worry can lead to becoming overly focused on seeking approval and validation from others. This can cause us to prioritize pleasing others over pursuing our own goals and objectives, which can limit our success and leave us more susceptible to gaslighting. To overcome these challenges and succeed in the workplace, it’s important to manage worrying about what others think of us. 

Here are four specific strategies that can help: 

1. Focus on your goals
2. Challenge your negative thoughts
3. Ask for feedback
4. Practice self-compassion

When we focus on our goals and objectives, we can prioritize what’s important and avoid getting sidetracked by what others may think of us. Remember, their opinion of you is none of your business. 

When negative thoughts or self-doubts arise, it’s important to challenge them and replace them, so instead of worrying about what others think, seek feedback from trusted colleagues or mentors who you know truly have your best interests at heart. This can provide valuable insight into areas where you can improve and help you grow in your career. 

Most importantly, be kind to yourself and practice self-compassion when you experience setbacks or make mistakes. This can help you stay motivated and bounce back from failures. It might be beneficial to schedule time to worry, so that you can put constraints on the time you spend worrying, while allowing yourself to focus on your work outside of that window. 

In addition to our performance, many of us tend to worry about the bigger picture items that can also derail our careers. Here are three of the most common ones: job security, job satisfaction, and career advancement. I hate to be the one to tell you, but job security is a thing of the past. In my parents’ generation, people joined a company and worked there for their whole careers. There was loyalty on both sides, but that doesn’t exist anymore, for the most part. 

Many people worry about losing their jobs, particularly during times of economic uncertainty. This fear can stem from a variety of factors including company downsizing, lackluster performance reviews, or changes in industry trends where you might get laid off because you happen to be working in the wrong department when the company decides to shift its focus. 

Some people worry about whether they are in their right job or career path. They may feel unfulfilled or bored in their current role and worry about whether they will ever find a job that they truly enjoy or whether there is such a thing. I was told to adjust my expectations because it’s called work for a reason, but I don’t think that’s necessarily the answer. 

Many of us worry about our prospects for career advancement, and that’s a real concern for women in male-dominated professions. We may move up steadily for a while, only to start feeling stuck in a mid-level position and begin to worry about whether we will ever be able to move up the ladder. This can also bring on a new set of worries about competing with your colleagues for fewer opportunities or promotions. Things definitely change when you are suddenly seen as a threat to their advancement. 

Overall, these worries related to career success can be common and understandable. However, it’s important to manage these worries in a productive way and seek help when necessary from a mentor or career coach to maintain your mental and emotional well-being.

Worrying can have a range of negative effects on both the mind and body. In the short term, this fight-or-flight response can be helpful in motivating us to take action. However, chronic worrying can lead to long-term stress which, I’m sure I’m not the first to tell you, can have negative effects on both your physical and mental health. 

Excessive worrying can lead to anxiety, which can interfere with daily activities and cause physical symptoms such as muscle tension, headaches, and stomach problems. These are all red flags that we should take notice of because our body is trying to tell us something is amiss. 

Worrying can interfere with our ability to sleep, leading to insomnia and other sleep disorders. Lack of sleep can exacerbate anxiety and chronic worrying can also contribute to the development of depression, a condition characterized by persistent feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, and a lack of interest or pleasure in activities that we used to enjoy. Again, another red flag to take note of. 

Sometimes our negative thoughts can lead to irritability, moodiness, and difficulty concentrating, which can make it difficult to engage in meaningful conversations or connect with others, causing us to withdraw from social situations. This may amplify those feelings of isolation and loneliness that can sometimes come from being just one of a few women in your office. 

Worrying can also have a negative effect on professional relationships. It can lead to decreased productivity, poor communication, and difficulty collaborating with colleagues. It can also make it difficult to navigate interpersonal conflicts, which can then interfere with our ability to focus and be productive at work. This may cause us to procrastinate, make mistakes, and miss deadlines, as well as contribute to a decrease in job satisfaction, possibly leading us to burnout. 

When we are constantly worrying, it can be difficult to fully enjoy leisure time. We may feel guilty for taking time off, or be unable to relax when we do, or take away from our enjoyment of activities that we would normally find fun or exciting.

Worrying is a common experience for many people, both in the workplace and in society as a whole. A survey conducted in February of this year by the American Institute of Stress found that job-related stress is the top source of stress for adults in the US and that 83% of workers suffer from stress related to their work. For as long as I can remember, being able to handle increasing levels of stress was a badge of honor. Little did we know that it would become more important to learn to reduce your stress level, rather than show that you can handle more. 

In society as a whole, worrying is also prevalent. The rapid pace of technological change, global economic and political instability, and personal concerns such as health and relationships can all contribute to excessive worrying. The past few years have understandably had a significant impact on levels of worrying with many people experiencing heightened anxiety and stress due to concerns about health, employment, and what might happen in the future. Implementing strategies for managing worry can be challenging, especially in the workplace. 

So, here are four strategies that can help us overcome worrying and manage our anxiety: 

1. Managing our time
2. Journaling
3. Practicing mindfulness
4. Engaging in physical activity

Effectively managing our time can help us manage our worries related to work and other responsibilities. Breaking tasks into smaller, less daunting steps and setting more realistic interim goals can help reduce feelings of overwhelm and increase productivity. 

Writing down our worries and concerns in a journal can help us gain insight into our thought patterns and emotions. Journaling can also help us identify triggers for what worries us and help us then develop strategies for managing them. 

Practice mindfulness by paying attention to what’s happening in the moment, without judgment. That part is key. Judging yourself for your worries won’t help. Mindfulness techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga can help us manage worrying by bringing awareness to the present moment and reducing stress levels. 

Don’t forget about engaging in regular physical activity like walking. For me, I consider walking an absolute necessity for my mental health, with the physical benefits being an added bonus. For me, it helps me regain perspective when things get stressful and overwhelming. 

It’s important to find strategies that are easy to get started with and work well for you because we all experience our stress differently. Adequate sleep is crucial for managing worrying, as sleep deprivation can increase feelings of anxiety and stress. Exercise and healthy lifestyle choices such as limiting caffeine intake and avoiding screens before bedtime can help improve sleep quality and reduce worrying. This can help us better manage our worries and feel more equipped to handle life’s stressors. This can also help reduce the intensity and frequency of worry, which in turn will help us better manage our emotions in general. 

When we worry excessively, it can cloud our judgment and make it hard to make any decision, let alone good ones. By building resilience and managing stress, we can improve our decision-making abilities and make more thoughtful and strategic choices. Worrying can drain our energy and make it difficult to focus on tasks leading to decreased creativity. By managing stress and building resilience, we can increase our energy levels, focus, and productivity, leading to better outcomes in both our personal and professional lives. 

Do you often imagine worst-case scenarios? One way to overcome this is to challenge these thoughts by examining the evidence both for and against them. For example, if you’re worried about your level of performance, ask yourself what evidence you have that suggests you will not perform well and what evidence you have that suggests you will. By examining the facts on both sides of the argument, you can gain a more realistic perspective and reduce your worry. 

Remember, it’s important to learn to set aside your worries effectively rather than simply suppressing or ignoring them. Many people don’t realize the extent to which their worries and anxieties can hold them back in both their personal and professional lives. Worrying excessively can lead to lack of focus and negative thought patterns, which can interfere with our ability to perform at our best. In this way, our bodies and minds are trying to tell us something, so don’t simply ignore the warning signs.

Celebrating our small successes and the progress we’re making towards our goals can help us stay motivated and continue to put these strategies into practice. By learning to set aside our worries, we can then free up our mental energy and emotional bandwidth to focus on more productive and positive pursuits, like developing new skills, taking on new challenges, building relationships, or pursuing hobbies and interests outside of work.

It’s important to note that setting aside worries doesn’t mean ignoring problems or failing to address them. Rather, it means recognizing when worries are getting in the way of progress and taking steps to manage them in a healthy way. 

Finally, taking action can help you manage and overcome worrying. Often worrying arises when we feel helpless or powerless. By taking proactive steps to address the source of our worry, we can regain a sense of control and reduce our anxiety. 

Remember, managing worrying is an ongoing process and it may take time and practice to develop effective strategies that work for you. Be patient with yourself and seek out support from others, as needed. 

And that’s it for this episode of Stop Sabotaging Your Success. Remember to download your Guide to Manage Worry at cindyesliger.com/podcast, episode seventy-one.

Thank you to our producer, Alex Hochhausen and everyone at Astronomic Audio. Get in touch, I’m on Instagram @cindyesliger and my email address is info@cindyesliger.com.

If you enjoy listening to this podcast, you have to come check out The Confidence Collective. It’s my monthly coaching program where we dig a little deeper into what’s holding you back in your career, and we find the workarounds. We help you overcome the barriers and create the career you want. Join me over at cindyesliger.com/join. I’d love to have you join me in The Confidence Collective. 

Until next week, I’m Cindy Esliger. Thanks for listening.