Welcome to the Stop Sabotaging Your Success podcast, episode twenty-seven. I’m your host, Cindy Esliger. This is the podcast focusing on what we can do today to take control of our careers and overcome the inevitable barriers to success that we encounter along the way. 

I find busy bragging really annoying. It’s that thing that people do when you ask them how they’re doing, and they tell you how busy they are, like somehow you should be impressed. We all have a lot on our plates. There’s always a lot to get done and even more that we haven’t yet gotten to. But why is it that people think telling you how busy they are makes them important? 

In this episode, let’s talk about letting go of busy as a status symbol or a badge of honor. Stop the glorification of busy. I’m not sure that people really understand that being busy isn’t the end goal. I think we’re all looking for a little more balance in our lives. I think we’d be happier and healthier if we found a way to reclaim more of our personal time. It’s all a matter of priority. 

Stop the glorification of busy. We’ve let the insidious busy mentality take hold, slowly, over time. Do we really think people are impressed by how busy we are? Or is it just a way to make conversation with the people at work? I get that for some, it feels good to be busy. It makes them feel important and needed. 

We all have a lot to do and that’s not new. But do people realize that most of what they’re busy doing all day is just noise. And some of that noise might not even really need to be done, if they would just stop and think about it. They may be taking action after action, but they’re actually getting less and less in the way of results. 

I think it starts by not glamorizing being busy. After all, we could consider that a hamster on a wheel is busy, but what are they actually accomplishing?

Being busy is a disease. It destroys your precious time. Being effective is using every minute thoughtfully, mindfully, as you make steady progress towards your goals. It means being deliberate and planning the way you work, and what’s most important. 

Many people tend to function using a bunch of scribbled lists, and many busy people lack systems for anything. It’s time to make a change.

Not everything has to be hard. Busy and effective aren’t the same thing. Resolve to stop doing whatever comes up, those things that create a false aura of productivity. And instead, focus on being effective. 

This shift is critical. You will still be living a very full life, but you won’t be in a chaotic rush all the time or wasting time trying to pretend you’re successful. Spending your time thoughtfully will get results faster than you think. You’ll be effective rather than busy. 

It’s become part of the company culture at most organizations. People are rewarded for looking busy, rather than for what they produce. We’ve all had those days, when we feel the pressure to look busy, so that they think that we’re working. We’ve mastered all the tricks to keep up the facade, making sure you’re at your desk before your manager arrives, and not leaving until your manager leaves, sending emails very early and very late just to show that you’re working, keeping a spreadsheet on your screen so that it looks like you’re doing something. 

But it seems the goal is to be seen working more hours than your colleagues. But what they don’t realize is that sending those messages at all hours interrupts people who are actually working and those who are trying to relax so they can work more effectively during their business hours. And when everyone seems so busy, there’s less tendency to ask for help because we expect that they won’t have the time. 

Managers have the ability to create a culture that focuses on what people get done. This can help people have more balanced lives, while still accomplishing what matters most that drives the bottom line. 

If your manager isn’t doing this, you can do this for yourself by getting clear and the expectations for your role, and setting doable goals, and communicating those with your manager, perhaps daily at first, and then weekly, as you get more comfortable. Getting clear on their expectations of how long tasks should take and using that as a guideline to push yourself to meet or exceed these timelines. 

Getting clear about interim deadlines, as well as client deadlines. And getting clear what to do if you get stuck, perhaps suggesting they establish office hours when you can bring your questions without the risk of disturbing their deep work. 

Making an effort to check in regularly, providing an update on how things are going, and whether you are still on target to meet the agreed upon timelines, getting clear on what to do when you have finished your primary work. It might be an opportunity to think about ways to enhance your organization services, or work on professional development, or relationship building. 

Some people will naturally take the initiative to do these things, but some just won’t. And these are ways that you can set yourself apart from the rest. 

In an ideal world, when people have completed the requirements of their job, to the high standards that are expected, they don’t just have to stick around, just because. I think we all know that everyone works at different speeds, some much faster than others. Once you’ve collectively figured out what needs to get done that should take 40 hours in a week, then how the work gets done is at least partly up to us.

If you want people to do their best work, don’t praise people for getting in early or staying late. Don’t praise people for sending email at all hours of the day. And don’t praise people for boasting about how busy they are. And from personal experience, if people leave the office at 4:00 PM, don’t say, heading out early today, huh? Because that usually came from people who weren’t at their desk at 7am. Sometimes I just wanted to remind people that we’re knowledge workers and we’re not working in a factory where you need to punch in and punch out. 

We like to feel important. Being so busy is now a very common way that people show how successful they are. I am working so hard. I’m so busy. Look at me, I have no time, I’m just busy. I’m so important, so many people need me. I guess they want a pat on the back or something. 

It’s not easy taking care of a family and a career and everything else that goes along with projecting a successful life to all those you think are watching you. I think most of us would prefer to be doing something challenging or at least something that we can see the purpose in, and doing that in the company of smart, engaged, supportive people. And to do it efficiently and then get back any extra time, to build new skills, or even to go out for coffee to get to know a colleague better. These are all much better uses of time than pretending to be busy. 

Feeling busy all the time can be an indication that you’re scattered and not using your time and energy effectively. It might be a matter of creating systems to manage your time and energy, then you will begin to see progress. That progress will then show you that your goals are achievable, without sacrificing everything else. 

Discard that toxic belief that pursuing your ambitions has to be a struggle. Create systems to help you go from feeling overwhelmed to feeling in control. Define your boundaries and set your non-negotiables. 

Schedule time in your calendar on a weekly basis for those life maintenance tasks, those medical, home maintenance, vehicle maintenance, in order to make steady progress on those and keep them from taking over your life. We tend to only realize those things need to be done once they’re past due. It’s that necessary part of adulthood, so we might as well make it work in our lives. 

When it comes to creating your ideal week, that requires setting boundaries according to the week you’ve mapped out. Look at batching similar tasks to avoid context switching. When you’re constantly switching from one thing to the next, you’re not being your most productive self, with your mind going in a million different directions. 

Set those boundaries and do everything in your power to stick to them 90% of the time, because there will be times when you have to make some exceptions. When you have boundaries, even if you have to break them sometimes, it does help you pause a bit to say, do I want to say yes to this? Or do I want to say no to this? Say no to the things that aren’t quite in alignment with what your goals are for the time being. Be sure that you’re saying yes and that you’re saying no for the right reasons, and that you’re happy with your reasons. 

Focus on results. Being busy is a pretty meaningless metric. What matters most is what you’re getting done. Managers need to be praising people for what they produce. It might sound obvious, but it’s much harder to do in practice. Thanking a team for the long hours can just roll off your tongue. Instead, thank them for their hard work and their insightful solutions.

It’s much easier when managers model that it’s okay to work reasonable hours, and not be available sometimes. Maybe that’s by not sending emails outside of business hours, because when they do, people will try to respond as quickly as they can. It’s human nature to want to show your boss that you are responsive. 

But even if they don’t, you can model the behavior that’s more reflective of your values. Don’t be afraid to show people that you have a life outside of work. You’ve been hired to do a job and produce tangible results, not just have your butt in the chair, pretending to work. You’re not in kindergarten. And you do have some control over how you get your work done, while still making time for the other important things in your life.

What people forget is that a little give and take means a lot. And it’ll pay dividends over time, by helping employees achieve some form of integration with their personal lives. You can tell people that you’re leaving for something family related. You don’t have to tell them that it’s a doctor’s appointment. I never really understood why appointments were considered a good reason, but going to an event at a kid’s school, was not.

Here are some suggestions for changing your thinking in terms of results. 

Identify the things that you need to do to move the needle, the right work, learning critical skills, promoting your work, and doing the things that matter. 

Plan your time and track how you’re actually spending your time, then review how you’re spending your time. How much time are you spending on the things you love, as well as the time that feels wasted? 

And continue doing what is working, and change what isn’t. There should be a correlation between something that matters and how much time you invest doing it. Usually it’s the trivial things we do unthinkingly that steal our time, not the big things. It’s the mindless use of time that needs to change. While it may feel good in the moment, it generally won’t amount to much of anything. 

It’s all a matter of priority. Sometimes the work we’re doing is actually just a distraction while we’re telling ourselves it’s useful, because it’s in line with our goals or those of the project we’re working on. 

We talk about how busy we are and how there are all those things that we would be doing, if only we had the time. I think a lot of people talk about how busy they are, and how they can’t do this or that. It’s time to just own the fact that you’re doing what you want to be doing.

It’s more likely that the things that you aren’t doing, are the things that you don’t actually want to do, or you would’ve made time for them already. I don’t have time is just an excuse. We prioritize what is important. And we make the time for the things that are really important to us. 

We’re doing the best we can and sometimes it’s messy. And before you agree to anything, first ask why, then ask when. Getting clear on the purpose of anything can help you make sure it’s a wise use of your time. And when we’re not intentional, our days can easily get so crowded that the other work has to be done at night or on weekends, and this can quickly lead to burnout. 

It’s important to know what the outcome needs to be, and then work backwards to figure out how you will get there, and how long those steps will take. When you have a compelling why, you will enthusiastically find a time in your schedule that works, to make it happen. 

You know the phrase, “Today, I’m going to give it my all”, but instead, I think this one I found on Pinterest is much more reflective of what most of us are doing: “Today, I’m going to give it my some”. The hard truth is that you can’t get everything done in a day that you’d like to, but you can get some of the things done. 

The number one thing you can do to manage your time is to prioritize what’s most important to you. Then it’s a matter of regularly checking in with yourself to ensure that you’re placing the proper emphasis on the specific areas of your life that are most important, at this season of your life.

It may be counterintuitive, but sometimes you need to add in a hobby or something you really enjoy, in order to rejuvenate you and energize you. But every time you add something, you have to subtract something else. And remember you can’t always be subtracting everything that benefits you personally. It’s a trade-off. And sometimes adding in something you enjoy is worth saying no to doing more of what you’re already doing, if you’re wanting to improve your results. 

When it comes to being more effective, keep in mind that every time you say yes to something new, you’re going to have to say no to something else. And it’s easy to try to do it all, but you simply can’t fit it all in, no matter how badly you want to. 

Sometimes busy comes in spurts. If it’s cyclical and you can prepare for it, it can be worth the effort to clear your schedule of everything that could possibly be done before and after things are going to be hectic. Do what you can in the time you have available. Circumstances will change. We all go through seasons of life. And when things change, having persisted through those tougher times, will make it easier by comparison.

You don’t have to figure it all out now, but do the work to determine for yourself what is most important, and make that your priority, and let go of the rest. Then stop saying you’re busy, when someone asks how it’s going. You are choosing to do everything that’s on your plate, so own it.

And that’s it for this episode of Stop Sabotaging Your Success. Remember to download your Guide for Eliminating Busy Work at cindyesliger.com/podcast, episode twenty-seven. 

Thank you to our producer, Alex Hochhausen and everyone at Astronomic Audio. Get in touch. I’m on Instagram @cindyesliger and my email address is info@cindyesliger.com. And if you liked the show, please tell a friend, subscribe, rate, and review. 

Until next week, I’m Cindy Esliger. Thanks for joining me.