Welcome to the Stop Sabotaging Your Success podcast, episode one hundred and thirty-nine. I’m your host, Cindy Esliger. This is the podcast focusing on what we can do today to take control of our careers and overcome the inevitable barriers to success that we encounter along the way. 

Reinvention is a word that can evoke both excitement and dread, often in equal measure. We like to think we know who we are, shaped by a lifetime of experiences, decisions, and the familiar patterns that make up our daily existence. But, what if who we are now isn’t who we need to be to achieve our dreams? What if, instead of just tweaking the edges of our current identity, we could become someone entirely different – someone better equipped to handle the challenges and opportunities that life throws our way? The truth is, reinvention isn’t just a possibility; it’s a necessity if we want to continue growing, thriving, and finding fulfillment in an ever-changing world.

In this episode, we explore the journey of reinvention. And, the reality is that it isn’t always a conscious decision. Sometimes, life has a way of nudging or shoving us into change before we even realize what’s happening. We may wake up one day and see that the person staring back at us in the mirror is different from who we were just a few years ago. It’s a transformation that can be both startling and empowering.

Whether intentional or accidental, reinvention challenges us to step beyond the boundaries of our old selves, to embrace the discomfort of growth, and to explore the potential that lies just beyond our comfort zones. And while the process may be daunting, I want to assure you that it can also be one of the most rewarding journeys we can undertake. 

We’ve all been there, sitting at our desks, staring out the window, wondering why our careers aren’t exactly the dazzling success stories we imagined when we were younger or perhaps a tad more naive. Most of us find ourselves in this state at least once, if not perpetually. We’re not where we want to be professionally, and whether it’s the pace of our advancement, a nagging feeling that we’re in the wrong job, or the quiet desperation of realizing that we might want to jump ship to an entirely different field, the dissatisfaction is real. So, what’s the solution? Reinvention. 

I realize the idea of reinventing yourself isn’t exactly a new one. It’s been the subject of countless self-help books, motivational speeches, and probably even some questionable late-night infomercials. Yet despite all the chatter, most of us approach this concept with dread, and rightly so. Why? Because change is scary. 

Reinvention isn’t just about tweaking a few things here and there to make life a bit more bearable. It’s about becoming a completely different person, often in ways you didn’t see coming or even knew were possible. Reinventing yourself can be the antidote to career stagnation. 

You see, most of us have been taught to treat life like a multiple choice test. Pick a career, stick with it, and maybe, if you’re lucky, you’ll advance up the ladder before retiring into the sunset filled with the hobbies you never had time for while you were working. But, life isn’t a multiple choice test; it’s more like a blank sheet of paper. And, reinvention is a process of grabbing that paper and writing down whatever it is you truly want. The problem is that most of us don’t even realize we’re holding the pen. 

But, as you may recognize, we’re hardwired to resist change. Our brains are designed for survival, and part of that survival instinct is sticking with what works. If your current life is keeping you comfortable, safe, and moderately happy, why rock the boat? Why leave the comfort of the familiar for the fear of the unknown? 

It’s why many of us find ourselves stuck in roles that don’t fulfill us. Whether it’s because we’ve deferred our own ambitions to focus on caring for others, had to deal with major life setbacks that derailed our careers, or simply found ourselves in damaging professional relationships, the end result is often the same: a loss of self, a downscaling of what we think is possible, and settling for what is, rather than what could be.

The truth is, most of us don’t go charging after change unless we get a formal invitation where someone is giving us permission or we’ve hit that ‘enough is enough’ point. And even then, it’s not a mad dash toward reinvention; it’s more like a hesitant tiptoe, when we’re so miserable we can’t take it anymore, hoping we don’t step on any landmines along the way. 

If you’re feeling stuck, if your life feels more like a holding pattern than a flight plan, it might be time to consider reinvention – not because you have to, but because you want to. Let me assure you, there’s nothing wrong with you. You’re not broken, and you don’t need to be fixed. That’s how I felt for a number of years, but I was wrong. I want you to be excited by the possibility of what’s next, and even if that excitement is tinged with a healthy dose of fear. 

Reinvention is a process. It’s not about waking up one day and deciding you’re going to be a completely different person by lunchtime. It’s about recognizing that you’ve changed – sometimes intentionally, sometimes unexpectedly, and sometimes so gradually that you didn’t even notice it was happening until you looked back and saw how far you’ve come. 

So, what does it mean to reinvent yourself? Reinvention isn’t about making incremental changes to your life or your job. That’s job crafting and if that’s where you’re at, go back to episode thirty-five and have a listen. Reinvention is not about improving the symptoms or circumstances of your current existence; it’s about redefining who you are from the ground up. Most people never go through a true reinvention. They might switch careers or pick up new hobbies, but they never really challenge their core identity. They never question the multiple choice options life handed them.

When you reinvent yourself, you’re not just picking a different option from the same list. You’re throwing out that list altogether. You’re starting with a blank canvas and creating something new, something that isn’t confined by the limitations of your past choices or the expectations of others. 

Here’s where it gets tricky: reinvention is a difficult mental process. It requires you to confront the beliefs, feelings, and identities that have shaped your life up until now. And, let me tell you, that’s no walk in the park. It’s uncomfortable, it’s disorienting, and it can create a lot of cognitive dissonance – the mental discomfort that comes from holding two conflicting beliefs at the same time. 

For example, you might believe that you’re only capable of a certain level of success because that’s what your life has shown you so far. But, if you start imagining a future where you’re operating on a higher level, your brain is going to push back. It’s going to tell you that you’re being unrealistic, that you should be happy with what you have, and that you’re not capable of more.

 But here’s the thing: that cognitive dissonance is a sign that you’re on the right track. It’s a sign that you’re challenging your current identity, that you’re pushing beyond the limitations that have held you back. It’s uncomfortable, yes, but it’s also necessary if you want to create a future that’s bigger and better than your current reality.

As I said, reinvention isn’t about incremental change – it’s about redefining possibility. Most people live their lives within the boundaries of what they’ve been taught is possible. They accept the multiple choice options determined by others, pick the best one, and then work within those parameters for the rest of their lives. But reinvention is about blowing up those constraints. It’s about recognizing that the options you’ve been given are just the tip of the iceberg, and there’s a whole ocean of possibilities waiting for you, if you’re willing to dive in. 

So, why would you want to reinvent yourself? Because you want to be the best version of yourself. Because you’re tired of playing by someone else’s rules. Because you’re ready to create something new, something extraordinary, and something that’s uniquely yours. 

If that’s you, maybe you’re ready to reinvent yourself. Maybe it was a life-changing event that pushed you over the edge – a layoff, the desire to escape a toxic work environment, or perhaps just that nagging sense of dissatisfaction that’s been simmering on the back burner for far too long. Sometimes, life doesn’t give us a choice. But, whatever the catalyst, you’re here and you’re ready to do the work. So, good for you. Now, let’s talk about what that actually means, because it’s not going to be easy, but it will be worth it.

Reinventing yourself is not a one-time event; it’s a process. And, like any good process, it has three key phases: 

1. Laying the Foundation: where we recognize where we’re starting from, identify what we really want, and let go of what is holding us back. 
2. Creating the Plan: where we turn those big dreams and bold decisions into a tangible plan by anticipating the obstacles and identifying the gaps in our knowledge that we need to bridge so we can plan for success.
3. Putting that Plan into Action: where we take all of your planning, dreaming, and strategizing and start making it happen. 

We start this process by laying the foundation. The first step in any journey is knowing where you’re starting from. Take a good, hard look at your current situation. What’s working, what isn’t? What have you been clinging to that’s no longer serving you? This is the moment to declare, with brutal honesty, that you’re ready for change. It’s not just about acknowledging what needs to go; it’s about committing to the idea that you’re capable of reinventing yourself, no matter how daunting that may seem. 

The next step is identifying what it is you actually want. This isn’t the time to be modest or to settle for what you think is realistic. Think big. What would your ideal career look like? What kind of person do you want to be? If you could wave a magic wand and create your dream life, what would it look like? This is where you start to break through the limits of the belief systems that have been drilled into you since childhood. It’s about letting yourself dream, even if those desires feel impossible right now. 

Next comes the tough part. This step is about identifying your limiting beliefs and deciding to let them go. It’s about having the courage to shed parts of your old identity that are holding you back. Maybe it’s the belief that you’re not good enough, that you’re too old to change careers, or that you need to play it safe. Whatever it is, this is the moment to decide that those beliefs no longer have power over you. It’s also about deciding to change your thinking, to start believing in a new possibility for yourself. 

Once you’ve laid the foundation, it’s time to move into the next phase of this reinvention process: creating the plan. This is where you start to turn those big dreams and bold decisions into a tangible plan for the future. 

We start creating our plan by anticipating what may get in the way of achieving our desires. This step is all about designing your strategy. Now that you know what you want, it’s time to figure out how you’re going to get there. Start by anticipating the obstacles that are likely to pop up. What challenges will you face? How will you overcome them? What habits, routines, and supports will you need to stay on track? This is where you start to design the life you want, one that aligns with the new version of yourself that you’re creating.

Development is the next logical step. This is where you figure out what you need to learn and create a plan to make it happen. Whether it’s gaining new skills, expanding your network, or changing your mindset, development is all about equipping yourself with the tools you’ll need to succeed in your new path. It’s about putting in the work to become the person you need to be to achieve your goals.

Finally, we move into the third phase of reinvention, putting that plan into action. This is where the rubber meets the road. It’s time to take all of your planning, dreaming, and strategizing and start making it happen. 

This phase is all about action. It’s where you start researching, exploring, and experimenting to discover your new path forward. This might mean trying out a new role, networking with people in your desired field, or simply beginning to live out your new identity in small ways. It’s about test-driving your plan and making adjustments as needed. It’s also about building your new narrative, the story you’ll tell about who you are and what you’re all about. This narrative is key because it helps you reintroduce yourself to the world and, more importantly, to yourself. 

While this process may seem straightforward and simple, make no mistake: this process of reinvention is intense. It’s not just about tweaking a few things here and there; it’s about completely busting through the limits of your socialized belief systems. It’s about navigating uncharted territory and striving for what you might have once thought was impossible. Reinvention requires you to think bigger, to create new belief systems, and to fundamentally change how you see yourself and your place in the workplace. 

As you move through these phases, you’ll notice that the world around you starts to change too. People will begin to see you differently because you’re showing up differently. Opportunities will start to appear that you couldn’t see before because you were stuck in your old way of thinking. 

Reinventing yourself sounds exciting, doesn’t it? While we all wish we could wake up one day with a brand new set of skills, a sparkling new career, and the confidence of a rock star, the truth is reinvention doesn’t happen overnight. It’s not a quick fix. It takes time. It’s a process that requires patience, persistence, and a whole lot of hard work. And yes, it might take a few years to really see the results. Why? Because real change happens gradually. It’s the slow burn of consistently making better choices, pushing yourself out of your comfort zone, and doing the work to become the person you want to be. 

And even as you’re evolving, you need to be able to demonstrate that change to others. You can’t just announce one day that you’re a different person and expect everyone to believe you. They need to see it in your actions, your decisions, and your consistency over time. Otherwise, they’ll just think you’re trying to manipulate them – or worse, that you’re not serious about the changes you claim to be making. 

Part of reinvention often involves gaining new skills and let’s be honest, that’s not as easy as it sounds. Whether it’s going back to school, taking online courses, or just dedicating time to self-study, acquiring new skills takes time, effort, and a willingness to be a beginner again. It can be frustrating to have to start from scratch, especially if you’re used to being good at what you do. But remember, every expert was once a novice. Embrace the learning curve, because these new skills are what will help you move forward in your reinvention journey. 

One of the most crucial aspects of reinventing yourself is making sure you’re actually moving in the right direction. It’s easy to get caught up in the excitement of change and lose sight of whether you’re making real progress. That’s why it’s essential to monitor your progress and make adjustments as needed. Are you getting closer to your goals? Are you seeing the results you want? If not, it’s time to reassess and tweak your approach. Reinvention isn’t a straight line; it’s a winding path that requires constant course corrections. 

Here are three tips to avoid backsliding into your old identity: 

1. Stay Vigilant: The pull of your old identity is strong. It’s comfortable, familiar, and safe. But, if you want to avoid slipping back into old habits, you need to stay vigilant. Keep reminding yourself of why you started this journey in the first place. Write it down if you have to. Stick it to your fridge, your mirror, or anywhere you’ll see it every day. When you feel the urge to revert to your old ways, remind yourself of the person you’re striving to become.
2. Surround Yourself with Support: Reinvention isn’t something you should do alone. Surround yourself with people who support your growth and who will help you hold yourself accountable. Whether it’s a mentor, a coach, or just a good friend who isn’t afraid to call you out, having a support system is crucial. They’ll help keep you on track and provide the encouragement you need when the going gets tough. 
3. Celebrate your progress: Reinvention is a long process, so it’s important to celebrate the small wins along the way. Did you complete a course? Land a new job? Even something as simple as sticking to a new habit for a week deserves recognition. Celebrating these milestones will keep you motivated and remind you that progress, no matter how small, is still progress. 

One of the biggest challenges of reinvention is being consistent. It’s easy to start strong, but staying the course is another story. Consistency is what will ultimately prove to others – and to yourself – that you’re serious about the changes you’re making. However, consistency doesn’t mean rigidity. It’s okay to reevaluate your goals and your plan as you go. If something isn’t working, don’t be afraid to adjust. Reinvention is about growth, and growth requires flexibility. 

As you go through the process of reinventing yourself, you’re going to experience cognitive dissonance – the discomfort that comes from challenging your established beliefs and pushing beyond your comfort zone. It’s that uneasy feeling you get when your old self and your new self are at odds. This discomfort is a sign that you’re on the right track. It means you’re growing, changing, and striving for bigger goals. Embrace it because it’s a necessary part of the process. 

Reinventing yourself requires courage – the courage to let go of who you’ve always been, to step into a new identity, and to live the life you’ve always wanted. It’s not easy and it’s not always comfortable, but it is worth it. Because at the end of the day, the only person who has to live your life is you. So, why not make it the best one possible? 

One of the toughest parts of reinvention is dealing with the opinions of others. People are going to have opinions about your life choices, and not all of them will be positive. But here’s the thing: it’s okay to disappoint people. It’s okay for people to be wrong about you, to judge you, and to not like the new version of you. What’s not okay is disappointing yourself. 

It’s time to see your past as a resource, not a limitation. While it’s tempting to think of reinvention as starting from scratch, it’s important to recognize that your past experiences are valuable resources. The lessons you’ve learned, the skills you’ve acquired, and the challenges you’ve overcome all contribute to your reinvention. The key is to selectively carry forward what serves your new direction and leave behind what doesn’t, allowing you to build a future that’s both informed by and distinct from your past. 

Sometimes, the most significant transformations happen when we least expect them. Life-changing events, whether positive or negative, often act as powerful catalysts for reinvention, pushing us to reconsider our paths and identities. Embracing these unexpected changes, rather than resisting them, can lead to profound personal growth and the discovery of new opportunities that align more closely with who you are becoming.

When you go through this process of reinvention, you’re not just changing your career or your circumstances – you’re changing who you are. The first phase is about clearing out the clutter, getting rid of what’s not working, and deciding what you want to keep. The second phase is about designing a new life and developing the skills and habits you’ll need to live it. And the third phase is where you step into that new life, executing on your plan and becoming the person you want to be.

Reinvention isn’t a one-and-done deal. It’s a lifelong process. As you grow and evolve, you’ll find yourself going through these phases again and again, each time reaching for a new level of possibility. And each time, you’ll become more adept at navigating the process, more comfortable with the discomfort, and more excited about the person you’re becoming. 

And, if you’re not ready to do that just yet, if you’re content with your life as it is, then that’s fine, too. But, if there’s even a small part of you that’s curious about what else is out there, if there’s a voice in your head whispering that you’re capable of more, then maybe it’s time to grab that blank sheet of paper and start writing your own story. 

Because reinvention isn’t just about changing your life – it’s about redefining what’s possible for you. And that, I can assure you, is the most powerful change of all.

And that’s it for this episode of Stop Sabotaging Your Success. Remember to download your Guide to Reinventing You at cindyesliger.com/podcast, episode one hundred and thirty-nine.

Thank you to our producer, Alex Hochhausen and everyone at Astronomic Audio. Get in touch, I’m on Instagram @cindyesliger and my email address is info@cindyesliger.com.

If you enjoy listening to this podcast, you have to come check out The Confidence Collective. It’s my monthly coaching program where we dig a little deeper into what’s holding you back in your career, and we find the workarounds. We help you overcome the barriers and create the career you want. Join me over at cindyesliger.com/join. I’d love to have you join me in The Confidence Collective. 

Until next week, I’m Cindy Esliger. Thanks for listening.