Welcome to the Stop Sabotaging Your Success podcast, episode one hundred and forty-nine. I’m your host, Cindy Esliger. This is the podcast focusing on what we can do today to take control of our careers and overcome the inevitable barriers to success that we encounter along the way. 

We’ve all been there: you’re pouring your heart and soul into a project, making sure every detail is in place, and pushing it forward with all the enthusiasm of someone who actually cares. But, then reality hits. Not everyone on your team is as invested as you are. While you’re charging ahead with ideas and solutions, others are either sitting back quietly, poking holes in your work, or worse, actively making things harder. The worst part? You still need their input, and somehow, you have to find a way to work with their different problem-solving approaches, no matter how counterproductive they may seem.

In this episode, we delve into how to handle one of the most frustrating aspects of collaborative work and still get the job done. Because, no matter how tempting it is to go it alone, successful projects require teamwork – even if that means figuring out how to work with people who aren’t pulling their weight or are slowing down the process. Navigating this minefield of disengagement, obstruction, and conflicting ideas takes patience, strategy, and a whole lot of creativity. So, let’s dive into how to best manage these roadblocks and still get to the finish line without losing your cool or your sanity. 

In an ideal world, every project we work on would be filled with a dream team of equally invested, motivated, and brilliant individuals who collaborate seamlessly toward a shared goal. But, let’s face it, that’s not the real world. It certainly wasn’t my experience. The reality often feels more like herding cats. You’re trying to drive the project forward, but not everyone on your team shares your enthusiasm or commitment. And, the worst part, you actually need their work on the project to reach the finish line. 

So, what do you do when you’re that person who’s all in, yet the rest of your team is a mix of the uninvested, the passive, the problematic, and, oh yes, the actively destructive? Let’s talk about the roadblocks that come with dealing with these various types and how to still (somehow) make the project work, even when it feels like you’re trying to push a boulder up the hill – while everyone else is sitting on it.

Before we dive into the nitty-gritty of our colleagues’ various contributions, or lack thereof, let’s acknowledge one universal truth: collaboration is essential. You may have come to realize that it’s a necessary evil, as I did, so we might as well figure out how to make it work. No matter how much we might want to lock ourselves in a room and single-handedly get the project done, in most workplaces, that’s not how things roll. Collaboration, when done right, produces richer ideas, diverse problem-solving approaches, and better overall outcomes. But, only when everyone is invested. 

Collaboration becomes a challenge when team members have different levels of interest, investment, or – dare I say – basic competence. When the success of the project hinges on input from others, you’re at the mercy of their engagement, or lack thereof. This is where we meet the four most common types of people you’re likely to encounter in the office:

1. The Doers: These are the hard workers who make it happen. 
2. The Observers: These are the annoying but non-interfering spectators. 
3. The Drainers: These are the people who make things harder than they need to be. 
4. The Saboteurs: These are the ones who are actively interfering with the progress. 

So, first up, we’ve got the ‘doers’. These are your kindred spirits, the people who actually get things done. ‘Doers’ are the problem-solvers, the decision-makers, the ones who take the initiative and push the project forward with both hands. 

‘Doers’ are self-motivated, proactive, and reliable. They’re not afraid to figure things out on their own, and they’re always focused on the end goal. If something goes wrong, they don’t sit around blaming everyone or the universe; they figure out how to fix it. 

In meetings, ‘doers’ are the ones asking the tough questions and offering solutions rather than simply complaining. They volunteer for the hard tasks because they know if they don’t, nobody else will, and the job might never get done. They also tend to quietly seethe while others aren’t pulling their weight – but more on that later. 

Working with ‘doers’ is great, and if you’re one of them, you’ve probably realized that the rest of the office isn’t always following your lead. And, this is where things start to get frustrating.

Next, we have the ‘observers’. These people are like the audience at a play – they’re watching the drama unfold, sometimes enjoying seeing you sweat, struggle, and hustle while they sit back, completely unbothered by it all. 

‘Observers’ aren’t necessarily lazy, they’re just disengaged. They’re perfectly fine with being passive participants in the project, happy to nod along in meetings, but don’t expect them to offer up much more than the occasional “Sounds good to me” or “Let me know what you need” while secretly hoping you never actually ask anything of them.

‘Observers’ can be identified by their tendency to remain quiet when decisions need to be made, rarely offering an opinion or committing to a course of action. In fact, their contributions are often limited to vague affirmations or unnecessary questions that contribute little to forward motion. But, at least they are actively causing problems, right? 

While they’re not technically slowing the project down on purpose, their lack of contribution can feel like a subtle betrayal. You need people to step up, but all you get from ‘observers’ is polite indifference, which leaves you doing the lion’s share of the work. 

And then there are the ‘drainers’. These are the people who, for one reason or another, make the project harder than it needs to be. Maybe they overcomplicate things, are indecisive, or can’t seem to grasp the concept of a deadline. They’re not malicious, but they sure know how to suck the energy out of a room.

‘Drainers’ are often well meaning, but lack the ability to execute efficiently. They’re prone to overthinking, preferring decisions by committee, or endlessly analyzing minor details. As a result, they create bottlenecks in the process, delaying the progress, and making everyone else’s job more difficult. 

‘Drainers’ can be spotted by their tendency to ask for “just a little more time” or demand more information, long after the decision should have been made. They might be perfectionists who can’t let go of the smallest detail, slowing down the entire team. While they think they’re being thorough, they’re actually just stalling because they don’t want to be on the hook for a bad decision. 

‘Drainers’ can be some of the most frustrating people to work with because their behavior feels like an unnecessary obstacle. You’re trying to move forward, but they’re constantly pumping the brakes.

Finally, we get the ‘saboteurs’, the ones who, for whatever reason, are actively working against the project. Whether they don’t like the direction things are going, or they just thrive on chaos, ‘saboteurs’ throw up roadblocks, question every decision, and create conflict that stalls progress. 

‘Saboteurs’ are often opposed to the project’s goals, or they have a personal agenda that clashes with the team’s objectives. They might be resistant to change, territorial over their ideas, or just plain disagreeable. Whatever the case, they’re not just passive obstacles – they’re actively making things harder. 

‘Saboteurs’ are easy to identify by their tendency to criticize decisions after they’ve been made, stir up disagreements, or flat-out refuse to cooperate. They’ll resist every change, drag out every discussion, and generally make sure that the project can’t move forward smoothly. 

These people require a careful touch because addressing their behavior too directly can lead to even more resistance. However, their impact on the team is undeniable and, if left unchecked, they can sabotage the entire project. 

So, how do you handle this varied cast of characters and still get the job done? It starts with recognizing their behaviors early and planning around them. Here are three tips to do just that: 

1. Set Clear Expectations: From the start, make sure everyone knows what’s expected of them. This gives ‘doers’ the green light to push ahead while subtly nudging the ‘observers’ and the ‘drainers’ to step up.
2. Encourage Accountability: Regular check-ins and progress updates help ensure everyone is on track. For those ‘drainers’ and ‘saboteurs’, accountability can be a motivator – if they know they’ll be called out for slowing things down, they might just pick up the pace. 
3. Use Your Influence: For the ‘saboteurs’, try to engage them in ways that make them feel heard, but don’t let them derail the project. Sometimes, giving them a small piece of ownership can temper their resistance. And, if all else fails, kick the problem up the chain to be dealt with at a higher pay-grade. 

You’re never going to change these people. They are who they are and you have to let them be who they are. But, if you can identify the type you’re dealing with and adjust your approach accordingly, you can still guide the project to success. Just make sure to pour yourself a large coffee for the journey (or perhaps something a wee bit stronger) because it’s going to be a rough ride. 

The good news? It’s not entirely hopeless. Despite the challenges, there are ways to navigate these waters without losing your sanity, but it starts with understanding why collaboration is so important and how engagement, effective communication, and a solution-oriented mindset can make all the difference in getting the job done.

Unfortunately or fortunately, depending on how you look at it, collaboration is a necessary function of the workplace, especially where complex projects require multiple skill sets and diverse perspectives. Without collaboration, we end up with a bunch of disconnected individuals working in silos, resulting in redundant efforts, which often creates chaos. 

But, collaboration only works when everyone is engaged. That’s the golden rule. If you’re the only one leaning in while the rest of your team is phoning it in, the project isn’t going to get very far. So, while we all recognize the importance of working together to meet project objectives, we also have to acknowledge that the level of engagement from each person on the team varies greatly. 

Before pointing fingers at your less-than-enthusiastic colleagues, it’s crucial to recognize that your own level of engagement matters just as much. You can’t expect to lead a team or make meaningful contributions if you’re disengaged, indifferent, or passive yourself. And, let’s be honest, it’s a lot easier to contribute meaningfully when you feel confident and knowledgeable. 

But, even when you’re engaged and ready to contribute, communicating your ideas effectively is crucial to getting others to acknowledge your input, especially when you’re dealing with a whole host of characters we introduced earlier. 

Here are three tips for communicating your ideas effectively: 

1. Be Clear and Concise: People tend to tune out when ideas are presented in a rambling or over complicated manner. Stick to the main point, explain your rationale, and avoid unnecessary jargon. If your idea requires additional details, follow up later with supporting materials, but keep your initial delivery clear and to the point. This increases the chances that even the most disengaged team members will understand and (hopefully) support it. 
2. Frame Your Ideas in Terms of Benefits: Whether you’re dealing with a hesitant ‘drainer’ or a resistant ‘saboteur’, you’ll have more success if you explain how your idea will benefit the project or them specifically. Instead of just pushing your own agenda, frame your contribution in a way that shows how it aligns with the team’s goals or solves a current problem. 
3. Invite Feedback: Collaboration is a two-way street. By inviting feedback, you’re showing that you’re not only invested in the project’s success, but also in creating solutions that everyone can get behind. This can be especially helpful when dealing with ‘saboteurs’ who often behave in that way because they feel left out or overlooked. Let them weigh in on your ideas – it may neutralize their resistance and get them more engaged in the process. 

I think we’ve probably all been guilty of identifying problems without offering solutions at one point or another. It’s easy to say, “This isn’t working”, but much harder to follow up with, “And here’s how we can fix it”. Unfortunately, problem identification without solutions is one of the quickest ways to derail a project.

That’s why having a solution-oriented mindset is so important, especially when you’re working with ‘observers’, ‘drainers’, or ‘saboteurs’. You need to stay focused on the end goal and keep moving forward, even when others aren’t as invested as you are. 

That said, not everyone needs to jump in with both feet right away, especially when they lack the experience or knowledge to contribute meaningfully. Sometimes, it’s okay (and even necessary) for less experienced team members to observe and learn before diving in and actively participating.

In fact, encouraging new or inexperienced individuals to observe the project dynamics before getting involved can help them better understand the goals, challenges, and problem-solving approaches at play. 

Here are three tips for transitioning from ‘observer’ to active contributor: 

1. Learn the Project Inside and Out: Before jumping in, make sure you fully understand the project’s goals, timelines, and challenges, as well as the personalities of those involved. This way, when you do start contributing, you can do so in a way that’s informed and strategic.
2. Start Small: If you’re not used to being an active contributor, don’t feel like you need to take on a huge task right away. Start by volunteering for a small responsibility or offering feedback on an existing issue. As you gain confidence, you’ll naturally become more engaged in larger aspects of the project. 
3. Ask Questions: Don’t be afraid to ask questions even if you’re just observing. It shows that you’re paying attention and trying to learn. Plus, asking the right questions can help move the project forward by sparking new ideas or clarifying points of confusion. 

No matter how hard we work, how well we plan, or how much we care about our projects, there’s always that person (or several) who seem determined to make things harder. Yet, as much as we love to grumble about these people, the truth is we’re capable of slipping into these negative roles from time to time. No one’s perfect and we’re all guilty of throwing a wrench into the works – whether intentionally or not. 

So, how do we avoid being that person? And, more importantly, how do we deal with those who are actively interfering with the project while still keeping things on track? 

Being the person who only contributes negative feedback without offering solutions doesn’t just frustrate your colleagues; it can slow the project down, create unnecessary conflict, and diminish trust. So, if you’ve identified a problem, don’t just dump it on the table and walk away. Come prepared with at least one potential solution or approach to fix the issue. 

If you’re not sure how to tackle the problem, that’s okay. Sometimes, it’s about brainstorming solutions – but you should still come to the conversation with the mindset of finding a way forward, not just criticizing what’s already been done. 

Being the one who actively interferes or obstructs progress doesn’t just make you annoying, it can be outright damaging to the project. When someone on the team is actively working against the current trajectory, whether by stalling, undermining, or outright sabotaging, it puts everyone’s efforts at risk. If the interference is severe enough, it can lead to missed deadlines, blown budgets, and even complete project failure. 

When you’re in a situation where someone is constantly interfering, it’s important to recognize the damage this causes, both to the tangible outcomes and the team dynamics. No one likes a ‘saboteur’, and even if the person doesn’t intend to sabotage the project, their behavior can lead to a toxic environment. If your team starts feeling like their hard work is constantly being undone, morale drops and productivity tanks. 

So, what do you do when someone is actively interfering with the project? Here are three key strategies for addressing and redirecting their behavior without creating a showdown: 

1. Confront with Curiosity: Instead of immediately assuming malicious intent, approach the person with curiosity. Ask questions like, “I noticed you have some concerns about the current approach. Could you help me understand what’s not working for you?”. This opens up a dialogue where the person can express their reasoning, and it gives you the opportunity to figure out whether their concerns are valid or just a product of resistance to change. 
2. Redirect Their Energy: If the person is dead-set on criticizing or disrupting progress, try to channel that energy in a more productive direction. Ask them to lead a small task that’s aligned with their concerns, or invite them to take ownership of a solution. People who interfere often feel powerless or left out, so giving them something constructive to focus on might shift their perspective and get them back on track with the team’s goals. 
3. Set Boundaries and Escalate: Sometimes, a more direct approach is needed. If the interfering behavior continues despite efforts to engage them constructively, it’s time to set clear boundaries. If you feel comfortable, let them know how their actions are impacting the project and the team, and outline the consequences if the interference continues. Or, if it’s hard to leave your emotions out of it, consider escalating the issue. 

It’s tough enough to make significant progress on a project, but when someone suddenly wants to change course halfway through, it creates chaos. Whether it’s a client who’s gotten cold feet or a team member who suddenly had a brilliant idea that somehow no one thought of two months ago, these last-minute changes pose a real challenge.

The most frustrating part? When the suggestion to drastically change course comes without considering the work that’s already been done – or worse, without recognizing the impact this will have on the project’s timeline and scope. Suddenly, you’re facing the prospect of scrapping everything and starting from scratch. 

So, when is it appropriate to pivot versus persist with the current plan? Here are some guidelines: 

• Pivot if the current plan is truly not working. If the data, feedback, or outcomes clearly show that the project is heading in the wrong direction, it may be time to reassess and shift gears. It’s not about gut feelings, but hard evidence that the current path isn’t sustainable -or- 
• Persist if the project is making solid progress and the interference is coming from a place of personal preference or discomfort with change. If it’s just a case of someone feeling left out or disagreeing with the approach without substantive reasons, it’s usually best to stick with the current plan and continue moving forward.

Remember to evaluate the impact of change by asking yourself, “Will this proposed change improve the outcome enough to justify the time, resources, and effort it will take to implement?”. If the answer is no, then you probably need to persist with the current course. 

A common misconception is that the project’s success hinges on everyone being equally enthusiastic or committed, but the reality is that you can make significant progress by strategically leveraging the strengths and input of those who are engaged, while diplomatically managing those who aren’t. It’s not about forcing everyone to care as much as you do; it’s about figuring out how to work with the disengaged or obstructive team member and still reach the desired outcomes. Understanding that you can push the project forward even when others seem to lack the necessary enthusiasm, frees you from the frustration of waiting for others to step up and empowers you to lead the project to success. 

Ultimately, getting the job done when not everyone is as onboard as you’d like them to be requires a combination of patience, strategy, and having clear boundaries in place. By staying focused on progress, addressing interference head-on, and knowing when to pivot and when to push through, you can keep the project on track – despite the obstacles. And remember, sometimes the best way to deal with the disruptors is to hand them a small piece of responsibility and let them try to figure it out for themselves. 

It’s amazing how fast people stop interfering when they’re the ones who have to make something happen.

And that’s it for this episode of Stop Sabotaging Your Success. Remember to download your Guide to Navigating Team Dynamics at cindyesliger.com/podcast, episode one hundred and forty-nine.

Thank you to our producer, Alex Hochhausen and everyone at Astronomic Audio. Get in touch, I’m on Instagram @cindyesliger and my email address is info@cindyesliger.com.

If you enjoy listening to this podcast, you have to come check out The Confidence Collective. It’s my monthly coaching program where we dig a little deeper into what’s holding you back in your career, and we find the workarounds. We help you overcome the barriers and create the career you want. Join me over at cindyesliger.com/join. I’d love to have you join me in The Confidence Collective. 

Until next week, I’m Cindy Esliger. Thanks for listening.