Welcome to the Stop Sabotaging Your Success podcast, episode one hundred and thirty-two. I’m your host, Cindy Esliger. This is the podcast focusing on what we can do today to take control of our careers and overcome the inevitable barriers to success that we encounter along the way. 

In the pursuit of career fulfillment, we often find ourselves standing on one side of a chasm which is our current professional reality, gazing wistfully at the shores of our ideal career destination. This gap, which can sometimes appear daunting and expansive, is not merely a space of lack or deficit; rather, it’s a reservoir of potential energy waiting to be harnessed. By acknowledging the presence of this gap, we open the door to transformative growth, utilizing our inherent discontent not as a source of despair, but as a powerful catalyst for advancement. 

In this episode, we explore the discontent we can feel in our careers. It can sometimes be persistent, somewhat unsettling, and frequently distracting. However, when channeled correctly, this feeling becomes a pivotal force, driving us to not only envision a better future, but to actively engage in creating it. 

This process of harnessing our professional discontent involves a strategic blend of self awareness, skill acquisition, and relentless perseverance. It challenges us to redefine our metrics of success and to continuously strive for a higher standard of personal and professional excellence.

Our discontent is often caused by the disconnect between the here and now and where we want to be. Most of us stare into this gap with a mix of dread and yearning, wondering why we aren’t already there, enjoying our success, instead of envying others who appear to have it all, not seeing the years of effort it took to get to that point. But, maybe we can use our simmering discontent as fuel to propel us forward.

Achieving professional goals takes patience, perseverance, and a refusal to settle for less than we know we’re capable of. The discomfort you feel when looking at the gap between where you are and where you want to be isn’t just natural; it’s necessary. It’s what keeps encouraging you to strive for excellence instead of settling for average. 

In order to bridge this gap, we need to balance the unhealthy anxiety going on in our minds with the healthy discontent we’re feeling. You may recognize this unhealthy anxiety as the stuff that keeps you up at night with endless ‘what ifs’ and worst-case scenarios. It paralyzes and exhausts you. Healthy discontent, on the other hand, is what gives you that nudge to push yourself beyond what’s comfortable and maybe apply for that promotion. This type of discontent is constructive; it whispers that you can do better and actually helps you chart the path to get you there.

Embracing this healthier discontent involves a bit of tough love. You need to challenge the traditional narratives of success. We all have different things that are important to us. For you, it may not be about having that corner office by the age of 30. Real success may be the quiet satisfaction of knowing you’re closer to your goals today than you were yesterday. To do that, you may need to set a steady, sustainable pace. You don’t want to be the one sprinting, only to be gasping for air at the sidelines, while those who are slow and steady pass you by and win the race. 

In order to bridge the gap between our ideal career vision and our current reality, we have to start aligning our daily actions with our long-term objectives. This alignment doesn’t need to be monumental daily strides that garner accolades. Small, consistent actions accumulate and over time they can shift the trajectory of our career more significantly than the occasional grand gesture. 

For instance, if you aspire to be a leader in your field, start by accepting the challenge to lead a small project team or take the initiative to mentor a junior colleague. Each of these steps might seem relatively minor, but they are the building blocks of the leadership skills you wish to cultivate. Similarly, if you’re looking to switch industries, begin by dedicating an hour each evening to learning new skills or networking within that sector. These actions will stitch together the fabric of your future role, thread by thread. 

Navigating through your career with an undertone of discontent is not about having to endure relentless dissatisfaction or constant restlessness. It’s about maintaining a dynamic equilibrium where you’re comfortable enough to operate effectively, but restless enough to push for more. Achieving this balance requires constant adjustment. Tilt too far towards comfort and you risk stagnation. Sway too heavily towards discontent and you might spiral into cynicism. 

As we attempt to bridge the gap between the reality of our current job and the allure of our lofty career aspirations, consider that it might not be about following that well-worn path up the corporate ladder; sometimes it’s more about building your own vision, piece by piece.

There tends to be three main types of gaps we face in our career journeys: the effort gap, the skill gap, and the quality gap. These are not just obstacles, but opportunities cleverly disguised as work. 

1. The Effort Gap: This is the gap between the amount of effort we’re actually putting in and the amount of effort needed to achieve our dreams. The first step in tackling this gap is an honest self assessment. Are you really working your hardest, or are you just busy being busy? There’s a difference, and deep down you know it. Closing the effort gap means recalibrating your daily grind so that you’re doing the things that will move the needle. It means prioritizing, delegating, and sometimes saying ‘no’ to projects that don’t align with your ultimate goals. 
2. The Skill Gap: Here’s where things get tricky – and a bit more tangible. The skill gap is the divide between the skills you currently have and the skills you need to not just function, but flourish in your desired role. This gap is often littered with jargon you don’t understand, technologies you haven’t mastered, and the experience you don’t have yet. The fix? Make a commitment to life-long learning. And no, this doesn’t necessarily mean collecting additional degrees. I’m talking about real, hands-on learning, like workshops, online courses, and webinars. Devour them like your career depends on it, because it does. Identify key skills that leaders in your field possess, and then put together a plan to start building these. There has never been so much learning available at your fingertips with online tutorials. But remember, sometimes a good old-fashioned book does the trick too. 
3. The Quality Gap: This one is about the difference between the quality of the work you currently produce and the excellence that is expected in the roles you aspire to. It’s one thing to do a job; it’s another to do it so well that people can’t ignore you. Closing this gap often requires a mentor, or at the very least, a brutally honest colleague who can provide constructive criticism. It means revisiting your work with a critical eye, refining your processes, and maybe even revising your standards of what’s ‘good enough’. Quality is not just about doing things right, it’s about doing the right things right.

Now, let’s talk about the challenges in closing these gaps, because, of course, none of this is easy or everyone would be doing it. 

1. Challenge #1: Complacency. It’s comfortable to stay where you are, to keep doing what you’re doing, especially if it’s yielding decent results. The problem? Decent doesn’t turn into stellar without some discomfort along the way. Overcoming complacency means continuously challenging yourself, even when it’s tempting to coast.
2. Challenge #2: Overwhelm. In the quest to close these gaps, it’s easy to bite off more than you can chew. You sign up for every course, volunteer for every project, say ‘yes’ to every opportunity – and suddenly, you’re drowning. Finding balance is key. It’s about strategic choices, not just saying ‘yes’ to everything that’s out there. Sometimes, less is more, especially when it’s done well. 
3. Challenge #3: Isolation. Sometimes, in our pursuit of greatness, we isolate ourselves. We forget that networking, seeking feedback, and learning from others can provide shortcuts through some of these gaps. Remember, rarely does anyone succeed alone. 

Think of closing these three gaps as part of a broader strategy where every move is calculated, but also where each step is adaptable. Demonstrate your agility by being ready to pivot as needed, but remain unyieldingly focused on your end goal. Harnessing your discomfort to propel yourself forward isn’t just about dissatisfaction; it’s about using that restless energy as a catalyst for continuous improvement. 

Keep your eyes on the prize, and when you stumble, and you will, you will need to be reminded why you started this in the first place. After all, bridging these gaps is about growing so much in the process that by the time you make it, you’re not just ready for the next level – you’ve already proven yourself capable. So, go on, close those gaps. Your future self will thank you. 

Let me assure you, these gaps are inevitable and essential parts of the journey. Just when you think you’ve got it all mapped out, there they are, ready to encourage you to grow, adapt, and become the professional you aim to be. So, we need to learn how to not just survive, but thrive amidst these challenges.

No matter how much you plan and prepare, these gaps will appear. This is not a design flaw in your career planning; it’s a feature. Each gap challenges you to push harder, learn more, and adapt faster. Embrace them. But, facing these gaps often triggers self-doubt, which can leave you feeling stuck. 

Here are five strategies to help you get unstuck: 

1. Divide and Conquer: Large gaps can be truly daunting. Break them down into more manageable tasks. No one is expecting you to bridge the skill gap for that senior role overnight. Take the pressure off and start with mastering one new skill at a time. I suggest you prioritize the tasks that will have the most impact. 
2. Set Micro-Goals: Big, ambitious goals are great, but the day-to-day grind can feel much less inspiring. Set small, achievable goals that lead to big results. Each small win builds confidence and diminishes self-doubt. So, start turning “I can’t yet” into “I just did”. 
3. Seek Feedback: Yes, feedback can sting, but it’s also the quickest path for professional development. Regular feedback helps you adjust your efforts in real time, ensuring that you’re not just working harder, but also working smarter. But, as I’ve said many times, before acting on any feedback you receive, consider the source.
4. Focus on Learning, Not Failure: Not everything will work out in the way you’d hoped. Learn to view every setback as a learning opportunity. Didn’t land that job? Find out why. That project didn’t go as planned? Debrief and discover what you can do better next time. This mindset shift is critical. It turns that paralyzing fear of failure into proactive steps for future success. 
5. Assess Your Progress: Are you closer to closing any of your gaps? What’s working? What isn’t working the way you’d hoped? Adjust as necessary without beating yourself up. Career development isn’t linear or predictable. It’s full of unexpected twists and turns and requires that you figure things out as you go. 

Healthy discontent is not about being perpetually unhappy, but more about maintaining a constructive level of dissatisfaction to drive continuous improvement. Comfort zones are cozy, but nothing grows there – except maybe that sense of existential dread that you’re not achieving your potential. And really, who wants that? 

Being a little unsettled is surprisingly useful. It’s like that pebble in your shoe that keeps you alert. It’s the nagging voice that asks, “What if I could do more?”. This kind of discontent sparks creativity and problem-solving. When you’re slightly dissatisfied, you’re more likely to experiment, take risks, and push boundaries. That’s when you produce your best work – not when you’re complacent and secure, but when you’re a little bit on edge, striving for something better.

The path to professional greatness isn’t always clear, and often you can’t see the endpoint. There’s no guarantee of success, and there are no promises that your effort will pay off in the way you’d expect. But remember, it’s less about the destination and more about the transformation that occurs along the way. 

Persistence is key. When the going gets tough, the tough get creative, adaptable, and even more determined. Every step forward, no matter how small, is progress. And with each step, you build resilience, gather new insights, and refine your abilities. 

Unfortunately, no matter how hard you work, the gaps will continue to be there. They’ll challenge you, scare you, and even frustrate you. But they’ll also drive you to be more than you were, to reach new heights you never could have if everything was just easy. 

It’s about embracing situations where we’re not the most knowledgeable in the room, where we might struggle, or where we might fail initially. This productive discomfort pushes us to adapt and improve, which is critical for anyone looking to make significant career advancements. 

Traditional notions of success often focus on instant outcomes and grand achievements. However, real success is about incremental progress. Healthy discontent keeps us from becoming complacent and encourages this continuous improvement. By leveraging our dissatisfaction constructively, we ensure that we are always striving for better and are actively engaged in our professional development.

The gap between where you are and where you wish to be isn’t a sign of failure, but rather shines a light on your limitless possibilities. Each step taken to close that gap fortifies your career and personal growth. Sure, the other side of this chasm might seem distant, but with each step, you’re using your discontent to move you onward and upward. 

So, the next time you feel that familiar itch of discontent, don’t suppress it. Harness it, channel it, and let it drive you toward the career success you desire. After all, who wants a career that’s just satisfactory when you can shoot for one that’s truly spectacular? 

And that’s it for this episode of Stop Sabotaging Your Success. Remember to download your Guide to Propelling Yourself Forward at cindyesliger.com/podcast, episode one hundred and thirty-two.

Thank you to our producer, Alex Hochhausen and everyone at Astronomic Audio. Get in touch, I’m on Instagram @cindyesliger and my email address is info@cindyesliger.com.

If you enjoy listening to this podcast, you have to come check out The Confidence Collective. It’s my monthly coaching program where we dig a little deeper into what’s holding you back in your career, and we find the workarounds. We help you overcome the barriers and create the career you want. Join me over at cindyesliger.com/join. I’d love to have you join me in The Confidence Collective. 

Until next week, I’m Cindy Esliger. Thanks for listening.